When I sat down in front of my boss late last week, I could almost predict what she was going to say, or rather, ask.
This topic had been broached before (about 2 years back), and that time, my answer was non-committal. It was more of a 'not yet'. It was not a direct 'No', but it was definitely not a 'Yes'.
Though it has been some time now, yet deep inside, I am still counting the ramifications of my answer. Sometimes, I wonder where would I be today, had my answer been an unequivocal 'Yes'.
But it has always been like this, isn't it?
Each time you say a 'Yes' or a 'No'; each time you make a decision; each time you make a choice, you close some doors, and open others. Some closed doors may never be opened again.
This is the tantalising speculation that sometimes, though rarely, haunts me.
This time, opportunity presents itself to me again. I am blessed with a choice. But the question that has been posed to me bears a heavy burden.
The burden is heavy, because even right now, my thoughts are in a flux. I do not yet know how to present an answer.
Yet, there are many things I know I can do. My time is long overdue. I need not hesitate no longer.
I should banish all those uncertainties. I know what my bent is. I know what works for me. It's time I laid them all on the table. If the doors will not open for me here, I will move elsewhere.
It's easy to stay in one's comfort zone, twiddling the thumbs, raking in the money, and think that there is nothing more to one's career.
But if you do that, you get stale. You lose your creativity. You do the same things, over and over again.
So, it's time for me to face up to this question once and for all. It's time to ask of myself, "What else can I do besides the so many thousand things I have been doing all this while?"
It's time for a reckoning.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
About something that matters most
It is always good to meet my parents, especially for weekend brunch and weeknight dinners.
Today, after sending my wife to work, I met up with my dad and mom for breakfast. We had vegetarian, and I had my usual cabbage, broccoli and fried egg to go along with the rice.
My mom knew I was heading to China this weekend. So, she passed me some renminbi from her home, and put them into a auspicious red packet, and thrust it to me.
Despite my repeated refusals, I succumbed to her generosity and kindness.
Always the helpful and caring ones, my parents.
And I am very thankful for them.
And, to mom and dad - keep up the exercise regime!
Today, after sending my wife to work, I met up with my dad and mom for breakfast. We had vegetarian, and I had my usual cabbage, broccoli and fried egg to go along with the rice.
My mom knew I was heading to China this weekend. So, she passed me some renminbi from her home, and put them into a auspicious red packet, and thrust it to me.
Despite my repeated refusals, I succumbed to her generosity and kindness.
Always the helpful and caring ones, my parents.
And I am very thankful for them.
And, to mom and dad - keep up the exercise regime!
Saturday, January 26, 2008
About what it should have been
The past few days haven't been very illuminating for me.
I cannot deny that the release of the O Level results kept my mind preoccupied for a great part of the week. My confidence rose and ebbed like the waves. It was always going to be tough to reject many colleagues and students who made morale-sapping comments like, "We're not gonna do well this year."
Anyway, I was glad to have Miss Kum by my side to give out the results slips to 4e5. We were very happy to see you in the hall. I wonder how have you been? I could not speak to all of you, as the Hall proceedings was really highly strung and emotional. It was hard to remain stoic under such circumstances.
To 4e5, I wish you all the best in your future endeavours. Your future remains bright, as long as you believe in yourself and think clearly about what you want to do. Some decisions are going to be difficult to make, but you must never be indecisive.
To those who are pleased with your results, well done. I believe that consistent hard work pays off, and in this case, I affirm this to be true, when I saw some of your results. The journey ahead will prove to be even more challenging and tricky, but just as you have succeeded before, you will also succeed in the future, so long you stay true to the values of diligence and hold fast to positive work ethic.
Some of you may be upset or bitter with your results. Some others might feel nothing in the immediate moments upon receiving your result slip. But the hammer falls hard, sometimes hours later, sometimes the very next morning, and the realisation dawns that you could have done better.
Regrets need not haunt you forever. Consider your options, and submit to the wrath of yourself and your parents.
But you need to move on. You need to make decisions - fast.
Stop playing the blame game.
Bounce back. This is the best way. Be resilient.
You can still get back onto the successful path. Do a reflection, find out how you can manage your time better next time.
Your self-confidence must never be diminished.
I will miss 4e5. We will all meet each other again. I know this for sure!
Another matter also hit me, like a sledgehammer, when I was still caught up in the tense moments of releasing the O Level results to my students.
My coach texted me to give an update on my boys' match against Nan Hua High School.
We lost by 3 points.
That was a blow that really hurt.
From then onwards, it became so much harder to retain that positive smile, when this result weighed like an anvil on my heart.
How I wished that the match could have been held on another day, so that I would fulfil both desires - to issue out the O Level results personally to my form class, and to be present (as I always want to) at this crucual match.
And as if the day couldn't seem to get any worse, it did.
In the evening, I went for the 1.5km swim trial at Yishun SAFRA, where I had to complete 30 laps under 40 minutes, in order to participate in the Biathlon that I have signed up for.
While I am very comfortable with running and sports games, I have never been an able swimmer.
My inexperience counts heavily against me. I rarely swim, and the last 2 swims happened in 2007, and that was during the Triathlons. Even then, it was only 750m in the choppy waters. I foolishly thought that the 1.5km swim in the calm waters of the swimming pool would be a piece of cake.
At my 26th lap, the instructor told me to hurry up. I sped up my breaststrokes, and kicked harder. I was not spent, but stamina cannot increase one's speed.
When I touched home, the instructor showed me the timing on his clipboard - 41 minutes.
Normally, I would be undeterred. I would tell myself, "Ken, it's not a problem. Just try it again."
But the day has been hard on me, emotionally, mentally and physically. I am emotionally spent, after Results day and the match result.
I just picked up the towel and walked off to the changing room.
The mood has hardly improved, though days have passed. Sometimes, I think to myself, "Could I have done more to push 4e5?"
This question, perhaps, will never be answered.
I cannot deny that the release of the O Level results kept my mind preoccupied for a great part of the week. My confidence rose and ebbed like the waves. It was always going to be tough to reject many colleagues and students who made morale-sapping comments like, "We're not gonna do well this year."
Anyway, I was glad to have Miss Kum by my side to give out the results slips to 4e5. We were very happy to see you in the hall. I wonder how have you been? I could not speak to all of you, as the Hall proceedings was really highly strung and emotional. It was hard to remain stoic under such circumstances.
To 4e5, I wish you all the best in your future endeavours. Your future remains bright, as long as you believe in yourself and think clearly about what you want to do. Some decisions are going to be difficult to make, but you must never be indecisive.
To those who are pleased with your results, well done. I believe that consistent hard work pays off, and in this case, I affirm this to be true, when I saw some of your results. The journey ahead will prove to be even more challenging and tricky, but just as you have succeeded before, you will also succeed in the future, so long you stay true to the values of diligence and hold fast to positive work ethic.
Some of you may be upset or bitter with your results. Some others might feel nothing in the immediate moments upon receiving your result slip. But the hammer falls hard, sometimes hours later, sometimes the very next morning, and the realisation dawns that you could have done better.
Regrets need not haunt you forever. Consider your options, and submit to the wrath of yourself and your parents.
But you need to move on. You need to make decisions - fast.
Stop playing the blame game.
Bounce back. This is the best way. Be resilient.
You can still get back onto the successful path. Do a reflection, find out how you can manage your time better next time.
Your self-confidence must never be diminished.
I will miss 4e5. We will all meet each other again. I know this for sure!
Another matter also hit me, like a sledgehammer, when I was still caught up in the tense moments of releasing the O Level results to my students.
My coach texted me to give an update on my boys' match against Nan Hua High School.
We lost by 3 points.
That was a blow that really hurt.
From then onwards, it became so much harder to retain that positive smile, when this result weighed like an anvil on my heart.
How I wished that the match could have been held on another day, so that I would fulfil both desires - to issue out the O Level results personally to my form class, and to be present (as I always want to) at this crucual match.
And as if the day couldn't seem to get any worse, it did.
In the evening, I went for the 1.5km swim trial at Yishun SAFRA, where I had to complete 30 laps under 40 minutes, in order to participate in the Biathlon that I have signed up for.
While I am very comfortable with running and sports games, I have never been an able swimmer.
My inexperience counts heavily against me. I rarely swim, and the last 2 swims happened in 2007, and that was during the Triathlons. Even then, it was only 750m in the choppy waters. I foolishly thought that the 1.5km swim in the calm waters of the swimming pool would be a piece of cake.
At my 26th lap, the instructor told me to hurry up. I sped up my breaststrokes, and kicked harder. I was not spent, but stamina cannot increase one's speed.
When I touched home, the instructor showed me the timing on his clipboard - 41 minutes.
Normally, I would be undeterred. I would tell myself, "Ken, it's not a problem. Just try it again."
But the day has been hard on me, emotionally, mentally and physically. I am emotionally spent, after Results day and the match result.
I just picked up the towel and walked off to the changing room.
The mood has hardly improved, though days have passed. Sometimes, I think to myself, "Could I have done more to push 4e5?"
This question, perhaps, will never be answered.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
About the gift of weekends
Here I am inside the sanctuary of Miss Clarity Cafe at Upper Thomson, and I'm sitting next to the cake counter. The cheesecakes looks irresistable and it takes some willpower not to fall for my craving and order one of those delicious-looking Oreo cheesecakes.
Nothing could ever beat the alcohol-laced cheesecake in Big O Cafe, or the unforgettable tiramisu cake in a shady joint in New York City's Italian quarter. Now that was one hell of a cake, completely overwhelming your senses.
The best bit of this busy week was having a lovely dinner with my beloved wife in a quiet corner of Seletar Camp. This bar and grill is renowned for its buffalo wings, where they are differentiated into various levels, according to the intensity of its pepper and chilli seasoning.
At first I was not so sure about how to find this restaurant. This place is highly secluded, located in a dark corner of this sprawling camp that dates back to the British era. There were no signposts. The roads were uneven, street lamps were in disrepair, and there were rows of abandoned white houses as I drove into the deepest recesses of the campsite. It's just perfect for my Toyota RAV4 4x4. Anyone with lesser courage would not want to spend any moment in those houses. They look hauntingly eerie. There's not a soul in sight.
Having been there only once before, I could only rely on my memory and directional instincts, so it was with great relief and pride when I saw the pretty lights that lit up the restaurant. We found it!
Needless to say, dinner was fantastic. If only we could have a heineken's to go along with it. Dinner with my wife is always a celebration of life and love. But of course, alcohol is a no-no, especially since I was the driver. So a glass of warm water each was just as good.
Another feel-good moment (many of them, in fact) happened, just yesterday, during the CCA parents' night. In the frenzied interior of the Hall, where a cacophony of cheers, screams, trumpets and chatter filled the air, I was glad to be able to meet familiar faces. I could not remember some names but it's was nice when they came up to me and said hello. Congrats Farhan, for getting a place in the polytechnic after your ITE studies.
I had a lovely chat with Syahirah. Goodness, she is very articulate and I was just drawn into her sharing about her customers at the make-up counter, where she works.
It's great to meet Farhan, Suhaimi, Jasman and Howe Zhong after such a long time. I'm glad that they came to support their CCAs (or his girlfriend, for one of them!). Nice chatting with you, Suhaimi.
The 4T1 folks - Kailing, Joey, Qiu Yue, Bao Hui, Thurga, Azzurah, Munir and Fauzee - brought a wide wide smile to my face. I sure missed their voices. You guys were fantastic and really funny. Munir - you can't run away from Kailing forever!
To Irah and Shahrin, chatting with you both in the canteen was a great experience. It was a very wholesome and engaging chat, wasn't it? And Shahrin, no, I don't think it's a good idea to get a motorbike! You guys make a beautiful couple.
To 4E3 and 4E4, I'm looking forward to next week's lessons in the AVA Room. Remember what you need to bring for the double-period lesson.
Thank Jesus for weekends. It really allows me to take a break from the massive work that lies in store for me.
And I'm excited because next month, there's the Vertical Marathon organised by NTU. It's time to start all those physical training again!
Lastly, as I was driving past Singapore Chinese Girls' School (a premier girls' school in Bukit Timah), I saw this banner that caught our eyes:
"From a face in the crowd, to one the crowd faces."
To my students - your individual value drops when you associate with people of questionable character and values. By persistently sticking with bad company, you will lose your individual sense of identity.
Conversely, choose your friends carefully and stay with the right company. At the same time, be independent. Achieve your goals. Have a dream, live your dream, work on it, and be anchored on the right values. Assuredly, you will shine.
Nothing could ever beat the alcohol-laced cheesecake in Big O Cafe, or the unforgettable tiramisu cake in a shady joint in New York City's Italian quarter. Now that was one hell of a cake, completely overwhelming your senses.
The best bit of this busy week was having a lovely dinner with my beloved wife in a quiet corner of Seletar Camp. This bar and grill is renowned for its buffalo wings, where they are differentiated into various levels, according to the intensity of its pepper and chilli seasoning.
At first I was not so sure about how to find this restaurant. This place is highly secluded, located in a dark corner of this sprawling camp that dates back to the British era. There were no signposts. The roads were uneven, street lamps were in disrepair, and there were rows of abandoned white houses as I drove into the deepest recesses of the campsite. It's just perfect for my Toyota RAV4 4x4. Anyone with lesser courage would not want to spend any moment in those houses. They look hauntingly eerie. There's not a soul in sight.
Having been there only once before, I could only rely on my memory and directional instincts, so it was with great relief and pride when I saw the pretty lights that lit up the restaurant. We found it!
Needless to say, dinner was fantastic. If only we could have a heineken's to go along with it. Dinner with my wife is always a celebration of life and love. But of course, alcohol is a no-no, especially since I was the driver. So a glass of warm water each was just as good.
Another feel-good moment (many of them, in fact) happened, just yesterday, during the CCA parents' night. In the frenzied interior of the Hall, where a cacophony of cheers, screams, trumpets and chatter filled the air, I was glad to be able to meet familiar faces. I could not remember some names but it's was nice when they came up to me and said hello. Congrats Farhan, for getting a place in the polytechnic after your ITE studies.
I had a lovely chat with Syahirah. Goodness, she is very articulate and I was just drawn into her sharing about her customers at the make-up counter, where she works.
It's great to meet Farhan, Suhaimi, Jasman and Howe Zhong after such a long time. I'm glad that they came to support their CCAs (or his girlfriend, for one of them!). Nice chatting with you, Suhaimi.
The 4T1 folks - Kailing, Joey, Qiu Yue, Bao Hui, Thurga, Azzurah, Munir and Fauzee - brought a wide wide smile to my face. I sure missed their voices. You guys were fantastic and really funny. Munir - you can't run away from Kailing forever!
To Irah and Shahrin, chatting with you both in the canteen was a great experience. It was a very wholesome and engaging chat, wasn't it? And Shahrin, no, I don't think it's a good idea to get a motorbike! You guys make a beautiful couple.
To 4E3 and 4E4, I'm looking forward to next week's lessons in the AVA Room. Remember what you need to bring for the double-period lesson.
Thank Jesus for weekends. It really allows me to take a break from the massive work that lies in store for me.
And I'm excited because next month, there's the Vertical Marathon organised by NTU. It's time to start all those physical training again!
Lastly, as I was driving past Singapore Chinese Girls' School (a premier girls' school in Bukit Timah), I saw this banner that caught our eyes:
"From a face in the crowd, to one the crowd faces."
To my students - your individual value drops when you associate with people of questionable character and values. By persistently sticking with bad company, you will lose your individual sense of identity.
Conversely, choose your friends carefully and stay with the right company. At the same time, be independent. Achieve your goals. Have a dream, live your dream, work on it, and be anchored on the right values. Assuredly, you will shine.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
About what makes a good day
It's only 3 days of school but I hardly got a moment to even take a seat on my chair in the staff room, so busy was my schedule and tasks.
But what was definitely good was that I was able to see students again.
Yesterday was particularly memorable, as the day was set aside for the Secondary One Sports Experience.
The Peer Leaders played a key role in ensuring that the programme went according to plan, so that all of the Sec One classes managed to try out the different sports on offer.
The senior and junior PLs were deliberately mixed and allocated to certain classes. I must say that the PLs, decked in the navy blue and orange t-shirts, certainly looked really cool and outstanding.
I am pleased that the PLs, on the whole, were able to keep the Sec Ones in check. It was good to see how well they managed the new students.
I am also very thankful for my basketball players - Zhi Cheng, Colvin, Andy and Haoming, for doing a good job in conducting the selection tests. It was very important because if they do a good job, then Fajar's basketball future is more or less secure.
I am proud of the way they handled the Sec One boys. They certainly captured their attention and managed to get them all to participate. Great job!
Finally, to top it all off, I got to meet some beloved students - Hazimah, Jasman, Lynn, Azzurah, Sin Han, Han Qiang, DJ, Swee Hong, Hamid, Haris and Zhining.
It was lovely to be able to talk to Hazimah, Lynn and Azzurah. And Jasman, it's great to see you. We all had a great game of volleyball, didn't we.
All in all, it's been a fantastic week!
But what was definitely good was that I was able to see students again.
Yesterday was particularly memorable, as the day was set aside for the Secondary One Sports Experience.
The Peer Leaders played a key role in ensuring that the programme went according to plan, so that all of the Sec One classes managed to try out the different sports on offer.
The senior and junior PLs were deliberately mixed and allocated to certain classes. I must say that the PLs, decked in the navy blue and orange t-shirts, certainly looked really cool and outstanding.
I am pleased that the PLs, on the whole, were able to keep the Sec Ones in check. It was good to see how well they managed the new students.
I am also very thankful for my basketball players - Zhi Cheng, Colvin, Andy and Haoming, for doing a good job in conducting the selection tests. It was very important because if they do a good job, then Fajar's basketball future is more or less secure.
I am proud of the way they handled the Sec One boys. They certainly captured their attention and managed to get them all to participate. Great job!
Finally, to top it all off, I got to meet some beloved students - Hazimah, Jasman, Lynn, Azzurah, Sin Han, Han Qiang, DJ, Swee Hong, Hamid, Haris and Zhining.
It was lovely to be able to talk to Hazimah, Lynn and Azzurah. And Jasman, it's great to see you. We all had a great game of volleyball, didn't we.
All in all, it's been a fantastic week!
Monday, December 31, 2007
About a fantastic 2007 and an even better 2008
Surely, there is much to be grateful and thankful about, as 2007 draws to a close.
As always, I am thankful to God. He has poured His grace onto me, and has been a most present help when I needed Him.
I will always remember my students. To those whom I have taught, I think you have been splendid.
To 4E5 2007, I wish you the best even as you enjoy your extended break. I hope you are meaningfully occupied and maybe now you realise that school is always better than have a holiday that's too long, correct?
I will see you all there, when you come back to collect your O Level results in early 2008. It will be good to have a 4E5 reunion again.
To 4T1 2007, I want to say to you that each and every one of you is brimming with potential. It is my fervent hope that you will excel in your ITE course and pick up useful skills that will help you in your career. I also hope that you will continue to lend a helping hand to others and continue to be a good influence to others around you.
For all of us, 2008 is coming faster than we think. I am very optimistic, because it means we all get to start anew. The past is to be forgotten, and let new aspirations be re-born and dreams re-ignited.
Finally, to my beloved wife, she's been incredible and I am thankful for her. I will continue to do my utmost to be a good husband and best friend to her. 2008 will be a massive year for us both and thinking about it sets my adrenaline on fire.
2007 has been a good year. Yea, of course there have been tough moments, but I am aware that for every challenging situation that had come my way, there are 5, 10, maybe 20 blessings and good moments too, and for that, I can't help but acknowledge that 2007 is indeed good.
So, let the new year come. With purpose (once you know your purpose, you will have power in your life) and self-confidence, there is nothing we cannot do.
As always, I am thankful to God. He has poured His grace onto me, and has been a most present help when I needed Him.
I will always remember my students. To those whom I have taught, I think you have been splendid.
To 4E5 2007, I wish you the best even as you enjoy your extended break. I hope you are meaningfully occupied and maybe now you realise that school is always better than have a holiday that's too long, correct?
I will see you all there, when you come back to collect your O Level results in early 2008. It will be good to have a 4E5 reunion again.
To 4T1 2007, I want to say to you that each and every one of you is brimming with potential. It is my fervent hope that you will excel in your ITE course and pick up useful skills that will help you in your career. I also hope that you will continue to lend a helping hand to others and continue to be a good influence to others around you.
For all of us, 2008 is coming faster than we think. I am very optimistic, because it means we all get to start anew. The past is to be forgotten, and let new aspirations be re-born and dreams re-ignited.
Finally, to my beloved wife, she's been incredible and I am thankful for her. I will continue to do my utmost to be a good husband and best friend to her. 2008 will be a massive year for us both and thinking about it sets my adrenaline on fire.
2007 has been a good year. Yea, of course there have been tough moments, but I am aware that for every challenging situation that had come my way, there are 5, 10, maybe 20 blessings and good moments too, and for that, I can't help but acknowledge that 2007 is indeed good.
So, let the new year come. With purpose (once you know your purpose, you will have power in your life) and self-confidence, there is nothing we cannot do.
Monday, December 10, 2007
About a genuine scare
The power wall socket in my living room didn't seem to be working very well. Apparently, a piece of the plastic 2-pin adapter broke off and lodged itself within one of the holes.
So, I decided to pry open the wall socket, and, as expected, saw a tangle of red, green and black wires.
There were 4 screws I could see and I had to release them in order to gain access to the broken chip.
However, after doing that, the broken chip wasn't dislodged.
I saw a few more screws, and figured that maybe undoing those screws might do the trick.
The red wires came loose even as I loosened a screw.
Next thing, an invisible wave jolted through the sinews of my left arm and I was forced backwards.
I staggered to my feet.
The mad thing was, I knew exactly what had happened, but I told myself that for a big man like me, that jolt should be peanuts.
But when the tingling sensation never ceased, I gave up working on the power socket, which laid dismantled in the living room.
I warned my wife to stay away from the area.
I felt as if my arm lost half its strength. The tingling was incessant.
But worse was to come.
My breathing became laboured, and my heartbeat felt as if it was pumping harder than usual. I could literally feel my heart beat and forcing my lifeforce with every beat.
I put my finger to my neck, where I could feel my pulse. What I felt sent a chill down my spine.
My heartbeats were irregular.
Somehow the electroculation messed up my heart rhythm. It could have burned my nerves in my arm.
I went to the doctor's. I really needed to make sure I'm all right.
The doctor said, "Oh dear," when she took my pulse. She felt the erratic heartbeat too.
An ECG was promptly administered. The readings revealed some irregularities.
But she assured me that my condition was not serious. More importantly, she told me what I really needed to hear.
She told me that I will heal. My heart will sort itself out.
Thank God.
Some medication was prescribed to me, and I am making sure that I take them regularly. Even in my weakened condition, I continued to work as usual. I was still limping around when I went back to school the next day after the marathon, but it's not so bad. Staying at home would have been worse. I'd rather have my students come for training.
Anyway, I called in the electrician to help me to repair the power points. I observed the way he repaired the power socket, so that next time, I will do it on my own again. Though I was severely bitten this time by my inexperience and carelessness, I think I will still do it if my power point ever get damaged in the future.
But if I ever have to do this again, I better shut off the electric supply first. It's a painful lesson I will never forget.
So, I decided to pry open the wall socket, and, as expected, saw a tangle of red, green and black wires.
There were 4 screws I could see and I had to release them in order to gain access to the broken chip.
However, after doing that, the broken chip wasn't dislodged.
I saw a few more screws, and figured that maybe undoing those screws might do the trick.
The red wires came loose even as I loosened a screw.
Next thing, an invisible wave jolted through the sinews of my left arm and I was forced backwards.
I staggered to my feet.
The mad thing was, I knew exactly what had happened, but I told myself that for a big man like me, that jolt should be peanuts.
But when the tingling sensation never ceased, I gave up working on the power socket, which laid dismantled in the living room.
I warned my wife to stay away from the area.
I felt as if my arm lost half its strength. The tingling was incessant.
But worse was to come.
My breathing became laboured, and my heartbeat felt as if it was pumping harder than usual. I could literally feel my heart beat and forcing my lifeforce with every beat.
I put my finger to my neck, where I could feel my pulse. What I felt sent a chill down my spine.
My heartbeats were irregular.
Somehow the electroculation messed up my heart rhythm. It could have burned my nerves in my arm.
I went to the doctor's. I really needed to make sure I'm all right.
The doctor said, "Oh dear," when she took my pulse. She felt the erratic heartbeat too.
An ECG was promptly administered. The readings revealed some irregularities.
But she assured me that my condition was not serious. More importantly, she told me what I really needed to hear.
She told me that I will heal. My heart will sort itself out.
Thank God.
Some medication was prescribed to me, and I am making sure that I take them regularly. Even in my weakened condition, I continued to work as usual. I was still limping around when I went back to school the next day after the marathon, but it's not so bad. Staying at home would have been worse. I'd rather have my students come for training.
Anyway, I called in the electrician to help me to repair the power points. I observed the way he repaired the power socket, so that next time, I will do it on my own again. Though I was severely bitten this time by my inexperience and carelessness, I think I will still do it if my power point ever get damaged in the future.
But if I ever have to do this again, I better shut off the electric supply first. It's a painful lesson I will never forget.
Monday, December 03, 2007
About being reborn
The Marathon has always allowed me to gaze a little bit deeper of my inner self. It takes courage to sign up for this massive run in the first place. But to complete it demands the highest levels of personal character and conviction.
After the race, it became a little clearer about how I see myself now.
My preparations for this race was nothing short of poor. I've certainly learnt a few lessons from my past marathon experiences and one of those was that there was an absolute need to set aside more time in the 3-4 months leading up to the event for runs, up to 4 - 5 times weekly.
But the demands of work and family left me with little appetite and time to run. During good weeks I could afford to run twice a week. In October, I managed a 2-hour run which I felt really comfortable about, and I was very pleased with my progress then.
Unfortunately, the month of November was cluttered with work committments, camps, and other matters which took up plenty of my time.
In the blink of an eye, the marathon weekend hit me, and I berated myself for being unable to fulfil my training requirements.
I tried to compensate by carbo-loading 5-6 days in advance, consuming extra portions of rice and noodles. I even managed to get 7 hours of sleep prior to race day.
When I got up at 3.30am wash up and have breakfast, I told God that I will need His grace and strength to see me through.
After breakfast, my friends and I shared a taxi and headed to the Esplanade Bridge. There was a mass of people, mostly decked in the ubiquitous Adidas race singlets that was given away in the race pack.
The first 12 kilometres brought me through the silent streets of Shenton Way, left into ECP, into the monotonous roads of Marina South, back into the CBD, and past Esplanade Bridge. I felt fantastic and I was enjoying every step I took.
The next 12 kilometres took me past the Esplanade, past Marina Square, past the Singapore Flyer, into Nicoll Highway, Mountbatten Road, and into my favourite jogging ground - East Coast Park.
At the 21km mark, I glanced at my watch: 2hr 22 mins. I was well pleased with that timing (it was faster than my AHM timing!) so I kept going. Physically, though I was feeling slightly worn-out, I still felt good.
At the 24km mark, near the old chalet area, my right calf began to tighten. In my mind, I commanded my calf to be strong. I still wanted to go strong at Bedok Jetty, the U-turn point.
And so I did, though my calf tightened in protest twice more. I pulled over by the side to do a calf stretch. It did wonders, for I was able to resume continuous running.
At the 30km mark (long after the U-turn, then back past the Mac's), my legs grinded to a stop. Stretching no longer became effective. Any attempts to run was met with cramps that caused me to be painfully immobile.
But I could walk. On my clock, I had just hit over 3 hours. I had another 12 kilometres to go. I told myself I was going to finish what I had started.
Kilometre after kilometre went past. I mumbled, scolded, reprimanded, cajoled, crooned and ordered my body not to yield, not to slow down. At the 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39km marks, I was swinging my arms madly, forcing my legs to follow in tandem, as I tried to do the quickest walk I could manage at that time.
The last 3 km was the most arduous. Honestly the strength to walk ebbed away. The last part of this race was my slowest. My target timing of 5hrs 30 mins became out of reach. But I still persevered. I could see the Esplanade and I knew that the end was near.
Once I caught sight of the greens of the Padang, I knew I only had a few hundred metres to the Finish Line. I tried to run!
But there was no grandstand finish for me. Haha. Down the final stretch, under the wretchedly hot sun, I hobbled the best I could and crossed the line at 5:39 on my stop watch. I clenched my fist in victory.
It was my personal best timing.
During the race, I saw a message on a blank tag that a runner had pinned on her back. It read, "Winners don't quit and quitters don't win."
I said to myself, "Aye, that's talking to me," when I was battling against my muscles that were paralysed with cramps.
This race is no piece of cake, and I ain't gonna say that it is. During the run, you will need to resist the temptation to walk; you will need to stick closely to your set goals; you'll need to cope with the weather; and you'll need to battle against your body.
But the most important thing that you need to overcome is yourself, really.
During those insurmountable moments, when I stared into the depths of the abyss of self-doubt and failure, I did not yield. Rather than achieve the same performance as previous years, I made the choice to push hard and surpass any of my previous timings.
Once I reached home, I took a shower and quickly hit the bed, for I was completely drained. Thank God for my lovely wife, who got me dinner. I was so famished but I was in no condition to prepare dinner for myself.
Yea well, the aches and soreness will be gone in a matter of days. I would think that I do not wish to put myself through such torture ever again, but there's something about the marathon that has got an allure to it, that will entice me to sign up for it again, next year.
Maybe it's the allure of that sense of accomplishment.
Maybe next time, I want to better my personal best.
With more training, I know I can do it.
After the race, it became a little clearer about how I see myself now.
My preparations for this race was nothing short of poor. I've certainly learnt a few lessons from my past marathon experiences and one of those was that there was an absolute need to set aside more time in the 3-4 months leading up to the event for runs, up to 4 - 5 times weekly.
But the demands of work and family left me with little appetite and time to run. During good weeks I could afford to run twice a week. In October, I managed a 2-hour run which I felt really comfortable about, and I was very pleased with my progress then.
Unfortunately, the month of November was cluttered with work committments, camps, and other matters which took up plenty of my time.
In the blink of an eye, the marathon weekend hit me, and I berated myself for being unable to fulfil my training requirements.
I tried to compensate by carbo-loading 5-6 days in advance, consuming extra portions of rice and noodles. I even managed to get 7 hours of sleep prior to race day.
When I got up at 3.30am wash up and have breakfast, I told God that I will need His grace and strength to see me through.
After breakfast, my friends and I shared a taxi and headed to the Esplanade Bridge. There was a mass of people, mostly decked in the ubiquitous Adidas race singlets that was given away in the race pack.
The first 12 kilometres brought me through the silent streets of Shenton Way, left into ECP, into the monotonous roads of Marina South, back into the CBD, and past Esplanade Bridge. I felt fantastic and I was enjoying every step I took.
The next 12 kilometres took me past the Esplanade, past Marina Square, past the Singapore Flyer, into Nicoll Highway, Mountbatten Road, and into my favourite jogging ground - East Coast Park.
At the 21km mark, I glanced at my watch: 2hr 22 mins. I was well pleased with that timing (it was faster than my AHM timing!) so I kept going. Physically, though I was feeling slightly worn-out, I still felt good.
At the 24km mark, near the old chalet area, my right calf began to tighten. In my mind, I commanded my calf to be strong. I still wanted to go strong at Bedok Jetty, the U-turn point.
And so I did, though my calf tightened in protest twice more. I pulled over by the side to do a calf stretch. It did wonders, for I was able to resume continuous running.
At the 30km mark (long after the U-turn, then back past the Mac's), my legs grinded to a stop. Stretching no longer became effective. Any attempts to run was met with cramps that caused me to be painfully immobile.
But I could walk. On my clock, I had just hit over 3 hours. I had another 12 kilometres to go. I told myself I was going to finish what I had started.
Kilometre after kilometre went past. I mumbled, scolded, reprimanded, cajoled, crooned and ordered my body not to yield, not to slow down. At the 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39km marks, I was swinging my arms madly, forcing my legs to follow in tandem, as I tried to do the quickest walk I could manage at that time.
The last 3 km was the most arduous. Honestly the strength to walk ebbed away. The last part of this race was my slowest. My target timing of 5hrs 30 mins became out of reach. But I still persevered. I could see the Esplanade and I knew that the end was near.
Once I caught sight of the greens of the Padang, I knew I only had a few hundred metres to the Finish Line. I tried to run!
But there was no grandstand finish for me. Haha. Down the final stretch, under the wretchedly hot sun, I hobbled the best I could and crossed the line at 5:39 on my stop watch. I clenched my fist in victory.
It was my personal best timing.
During the race, I saw a message on a blank tag that a runner had pinned on her back. It read, "Winners don't quit and quitters don't win."
I said to myself, "Aye, that's talking to me," when I was battling against my muscles that were paralysed with cramps.
This race is no piece of cake, and I ain't gonna say that it is. During the run, you will need to resist the temptation to walk; you will need to stick closely to your set goals; you'll need to cope with the weather; and you'll need to battle against your body.
But the most important thing that you need to overcome is yourself, really.
During those insurmountable moments, when I stared into the depths of the abyss of self-doubt and failure, I did not yield. Rather than achieve the same performance as previous years, I made the choice to push hard and surpass any of my previous timings.
Once I reached home, I took a shower and quickly hit the bed, for I was completely drained. Thank God for my lovely wife, who got me dinner. I was so famished but I was in no condition to prepare dinner for myself.
Yea well, the aches and soreness will be gone in a matter of days. I would think that I do not wish to put myself through such torture ever again, but there's something about the marathon that has got an allure to it, that will entice me to sign up for it again, next year.
Maybe it's the allure of that sense of accomplishment.
Maybe next time, I want to better my personal best.
With more training, I know I can do it.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
About the big race
It's rare, but I do feel somewhat regretful now.
I should not have accepted this advanced diploma course in information & communication technology that is currently ongoing right now in school.
This intensive course has taken away precious training and resting time from me. I need to do all those because this Sunday's the big race - the Standard Chartered Marathon.
In fact, just thinking about it sets my pulse racing.
I think it's because it'll be the hardest thing I'll be doing this year. I think my body isn't going to forgive me so easily for putting it under such punishment.
And so, while I am seated in front of the desktop, while the instructor rants on and on about the power of Excel and Word, sometimes my thoughts drift away. Suddenly I get transported to the remote Marina area, or the empty streets of Shenton Way, running, running and running in the Marathon. I'm already mentally preparing myself.
To the basketball boys, just to share with you that training is now in full flow. The coach and I have big plans for you all. We are committed towards training you all in improving your skills and team play. We need absolute commitment from each and every one of you. I'm talking about attendance and giving your 110% during each training. That's how you improve. That's how Fajar will improve.
We need to make the school proud of the Basketball CCA.
A special word of thanks to the players who have been very helpful to me - Haoming, Zhi Cheng, Vincent and others who have been so willing to help. That's the spirit guys. Keep up the good work. We still have so much more to do to strengthen the team spirit within us!
This computer course that I'm going through has prevented me from being with my basketball boys. I thank God then, that I have reliable players and a good coach who can help me to keep the CCA running while I am busy. Let me be very clear - I always want to be with my boys whenever they train. The reason is very simple. I am responsible for these boys and they are important to me.
Another reason why I am stuck to the computer lab is because there is an exam on Friday morning, which we all have to pass. I certainly do not want to fail. I am targetting a pass and I want to lay my hands on that certificate. So I have been paying attention to the instructor. Though he can be somewhat queer, I have to say that he has taught all of us plenty of tricks with Excel and Word and I am very grateful for that. I am very glad to be able to learn something new.
Once the exam is over, I have the Peer Leaders' Meeting to look forward to. That's going to be on Saturday morning. Sunday's the big 42km race and I know I'm going to be hitting the bed all day long after that, once I drag my body back from the Padang.
And the best thing is - I get to return back to school on the very next day for Basketball and other work. How exciting!
I should not have accepted this advanced diploma course in information & communication technology that is currently ongoing right now in school.
This intensive course has taken away precious training and resting time from me. I need to do all those because this Sunday's the big race - the Standard Chartered Marathon.
In fact, just thinking about it sets my pulse racing.
I think it's because it'll be the hardest thing I'll be doing this year. I think my body isn't going to forgive me so easily for putting it under such punishment.
And so, while I am seated in front of the desktop, while the instructor rants on and on about the power of Excel and Word, sometimes my thoughts drift away. Suddenly I get transported to the remote Marina area, or the empty streets of Shenton Way, running, running and running in the Marathon. I'm already mentally preparing myself.
To the basketball boys, just to share with you that training is now in full flow. The coach and I have big plans for you all. We are committed towards training you all in improving your skills and team play. We need absolute commitment from each and every one of you. I'm talking about attendance and giving your 110% during each training. That's how you improve. That's how Fajar will improve.
We need to make the school proud of the Basketball CCA.
A special word of thanks to the players who have been very helpful to me - Haoming, Zhi Cheng, Vincent and others who have been so willing to help. That's the spirit guys. Keep up the good work. We still have so much more to do to strengthen the team spirit within us!
This computer course that I'm going through has prevented me from being with my basketball boys. I thank God then, that I have reliable players and a good coach who can help me to keep the CCA running while I am busy. Let me be very clear - I always want to be with my boys whenever they train. The reason is very simple. I am responsible for these boys and they are important to me.
Another reason why I am stuck to the computer lab is because there is an exam on Friday morning, which we all have to pass. I certainly do not want to fail. I am targetting a pass and I want to lay my hands on that certificate. So I have been paying attention to the instructor. Though he can be somewhat queer, I have to say that he has taught all of us plenty of tricks with Excel and Word and I am very grateful for that. I am very glad to be able to learn something new.
Once the exam is over, I have the Peer Leaders' Meeting to look forward to. That's going to be on Saturday morning. Sunday's the big 42km race and I know I'm going to be hitting the bed all day long after that, once I drag my body back from the Padang.
And the best thing is - I get to return back to school on the very next day for Basketball and other work. How exciting!
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
About doing things - my way
A conversation with a colleague left me contemplating a little bit more than usual about how I have been making conscious decisions about my career.
After spending 5 years in this job, my heartfelt opinion is that I have got one of the best jobs in the world. Nothing is surely more exciting than being able to interact with youths and mentoring them into leaders of tomorrow, through education, sports and outdoor adventure.
I could never imagine myself in a desk-bound job, or a job that required me to meet sales quotas. I don't think God made me that way.
So I am always thankful that I have found my purpose. Doing what I do has been satisfying. The students who have come into my life (from my very first class in Fajar - 3T1 2002) till the ones today - they have been very good and I have been blessed by them.
But the dilemma is: is job satisfaction more important than career advancement?
I think I have been very choosy in accepting offers or job titles that take me away from students. Sometimes, friends have told me that I'm a fool for doing so.
I disagree.
I know what I want in my life.
I'm very particular about what I want to achieve. Even if it means stepping on somebody's toes or crossing my superiors, I will still decline and say 'No' to that task or that job if I feel that it doesn't suit me or if it is something that I know I cannot cope with.
I will not always say 'yes'.
Maybe it's the way I've been brought up. Maybe it's how God has been gently guiding me through my career. But I get very sensitive when my personal time is affected. I get very sensitive when my family time is affected.
My family, my time, my community projects, my students, my church activities - all these I hold high in my list of priorities. Notice that my work is not in the 'list'.
How can it be? Does it mean that I do not give my all in my work?
Nay.
I very strongly believe that if I have a blessed private life, with a close relationship with my wife and our parents, then I will wield even greater power to do well in my career.
And I can testify solidly that in the past 5 years, praise God, I have succeeded in achieving both. I do not wish to be a public success, yet fail in my private life.
So, even though there have been some murmurs of me being choosy and what not, I do not care about what others think.
I am answerable only to my God and my family. They are important to me, and I make sure I save my energies for them. I will not fall into that trap of depleting my youth into the bottomless pit called work.
After spending 5 years in this job, my heartfelt opinion is that I have got one of the best jobs in the world. Nothing is surely more exciting than being able to interact with youths and mentoring them into leaders of tomorrow, through education, sports and outdoor adventure.
I could never imagine myself in a desk-bound job, or a job that required me to meet sales quotas. I don't think God made me that way.
So I am always thankful that I have found my purpose. Doing what I do has been satisfying. The students who have come into my life (from my very first class in Fajar - 3T1 2002) till the ones today - they have been very good and I have been blessed by them.
But the dilemma is: is job satisfaction more important than career advancement?
I think I have been very choosy in accepting offers or job titles that take me away from students. Sometimes, friends have told me that I'm a fool for doing so.
I disagree.
I know what I want in my life.
I'm very particular about what I want to achieve. Even if it means stepping on somebody's toes or crossing my superiors, I will still decline and say 'No' to that task or that job if I feel that it doesn't suit me or if it is something that I know I cannot cope with.
I will not always say 'yes'.
Maybe it's the way I've been brought up. Maybe it's how God has been gently guiding me through my career. But I get very sensitive when my personal time is affected. I get very sensitive when my family time is affected.
My family, my time, my community projects, my students, my church activities - all these I hold high in my list of priorities. Notice that my work is not in the 'list'.
How can it be? Does it mean that I do not give my all in my work?
Nay.
I very strongly believe that if I have a blessed private life, with a close relationship with my wife and our parents, then I will wield even greater power to do well in my career.
And I can testify solidly that in the past 5 years, praise God, I have succeeded in achieving both. I do not wish to be a public success, yet fail in my private life.
So, even though there have been some murmurs of me being choosy and what not, I do not care about what others think.
I am answerable only to my God and my family. They are important to me, and I make sure I save my energies for them. I will not fall into that trap of depleting my youth into the bottomless pit called work.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
About graduation
Thanks for the memories, 4e5 and the graduating students of 4E4NA4NT5N.
It was great to see so many of you come for Graduation Day, in spite of the wet weather. I think it's a good idea to come for a graduation event (even if it's not a prom night) because it is a rite of passage, a necessary piece of a teenager's adolescence years. It marks the start of young adulthood - of greater responsibilities, and more opportunities to make bigger decisions independently.
It was fantastic when some of you came up to speak to me. Thank you for your kind words.
I want to thank you too, for being having a heart to serve and to lead, to have a heart to learn and to be taught. You have all grown up right before my eyes!
So Graduation Day, for me, is a bittersweet affair. Sweet, because naturally I am proud of you all, that you've come so far, and will be embarking on the next stage of your lives; bitter, because I know I am going to miss those times we've talked and chatted with each other. I will miss teaching you all PE and English. I will miss seeing you all eating and chatting happily, when I make my rounds around the canteen next year.
To 4e5, I hope to receive 40 wedding invites from you all, a few years from now! When your baby is one month old, throw a party and get all of us together!
To my beloved 4e5 and to the graduated students, take good care. Remember to have a vision of your future. Think big. Get onto the shoulders of giants (successful people). Stay away from lazy and corrupt people. Be persistent. Be anchored on the right values (sincere, kind, generous, hardworking, honest, faithful etc).
You will then go far in life.
Of course, even though you've graduated, we still can keep in touch, isn't it!
"To laugh often and much,
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to earn the appreciation of honest critics and
endure the betrayal of false friends,
to find the best in others,
to leave the world a bit better,
to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded!" - Emerson
It was great to see so many of you come for Graduation Day, in spite of the wet weather. I think it's a good idea to come for a graduation event (even if it's not a prom night) because it is a rite of passage, a necessary piece of a teenager's adolescence years. It marks the start of young adulthood - of greater responsibilities, and more opportunities to make bigger decisions independently.
It was fantastic when some of you came up to speak to me. Thank you for your kind words.
I want to thank you too, for being having a heart to serve and to lead, to have a heart to learn and to be taught. You have all grown up right before my eyes!
So Graduation Day, for me, is a bittersweet affair. Sweet, because naturally I am proud of you all, that you've come so far, and will be embarking on the next stage of your lives; bitter, because I know I am going to miss those times we've talked and chatted with each other. I will miss teaching you all PE and English. I will miss seeing you all eating and chatting happily, when I make my rounds around the canteen next year.
To 4e5, I hope to receive 40 wedding invites from you all, a few years from now! When your baby is one month old, throw a party and get all of us together!
To my beloved 4e5 and to the graduated students, take good care. Remember to have a vision of your future. Think big. Get onto the shoulders of giants (successful people). Stay away from lazy and corrupt people. Be persistent. Be anchored on the right values (sincere, kind, generous, hardworking, honest, faithful etc).
You will then go far in life.
Of course, even though you've graduated, we still can keep in touch, isn't it!
"To laugh often and much,
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to earn the appreciation of honest critics and
endure the betrayal of false friends,
to find the best in others,
to leave the world a bit better,
to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded!" - Emerson
Friday, November 02, 2007
About knowing what you really want
Many thanks to my colleagues who teamed up with me to conduct the Peer Leader Selection Interviews.
We are aware that many students who sat through such Interviews would have been almost paralysed with fear and anxiety. I think that this anxiety is excerbated by the massive Conference Room table and the freezing air-conditioning in the Conference Room.
However, the Interviews fulfil a crucial task, and that is to sieve out those students of genuine quality and those with the potential to go far. Obviously your academic performances and daily conduct in school are essential factors in determining whether you get a shot at the Interview or not.
And so, it was extremely perplexing to us when a few students seemed to be overtaken by a spirit of muteness. They seemed incapable of answering simple questions.
No. Do not say that it is just a matter of that student being too nervous.
You must understand that in any Interview, it is your one chance to leave a positive impression on the board of interviewers and make an impact on them. Answering our questions capably and elaborating on them would go a long way in helping you progress beyond Round 1.
For those who had froze, you most likely lost your chance. You have to show us that you really want the job.
To the Peer Leader trainees, just remember, you are one step closer towards a life-changing milestone in your life. I am not exaggerating.
Becoming a Peer Leader opens up a multitude of doors in your life. These doors lead to greater opportunities for personal development and community service. Your life won't be the same, if the School deems you as worthy to be a Peer Leader.
Looking at the big picture, whether or not the photo of the PLs appears in the school magazine is an issue that pales in comparison to their deeds and acts of services. The School knows about the hard work that you have done all these years and deeply appreciates the difference that you have made in our school.
There will be tonnes to do next year, PLs. Just make sure that when school resumes in 2008, you are all set to serve.
At the moment though, I will soon be organising a meeting with all you Sec 3 PLs to discuss about your duties and responsibilities for this year's edition of the Peer Leaders' Training Camp in mid-December. We will be meeting once you are all back from OBS.
It's time for us to raise up a new generation of Peer Leaders. Are the Sec 2 trainees ready to rise up and step into bigger shoes?
We are aware that many students who sat through such Interviews would have been almost paralysed with fear and anxiety. I think that this anxiety is excerbated by the massive Conference Room table and the freezing air-conditioning in the Conference Room.
However, the Interviews fulfil a crucial task, and that is to sieve out those students of genuine quality and those with the potential to go far. Obviously your academic performances and daily conduct in school are essential factors in determining whether you get a shot at the Interview or not.
And so, it was extremely perplexing to us when a few students seemed to be overtaken by a spirit of muteness. They seemed incapable of answering simple questions.
No. Do not say that it is just a matter of that student being too nervous.
You must understand that in any Interview, it is your one chance to leave a positive impression on the board of interviewers and make an impact on them. Answering our questions capably and elaborating on them would go a long way in helping you progress beyond Round 1.
For those who had froze, you most likely lost your chance. You have to show us that you really want the job.
To the Peer Leader trainees, just remember, you are one step closer towards a life-changing milestone in your life. I am not exaggerating.
Becoming a Peer Leader opens up a multitude of doors in your life. These doors lead to greater opportunities for personal development and community service. Your life won't be the same, if the School deems you as worthy to be a Peer Leader.
Looking at the big picture, whether or not the photo of the PLs appears in the school magazine is an issue that pales in comparison to their deeds and acts of services. The School knows about the hard work that you have done all these years and deeply appreciates the difference that you have made in our school.
There will be tonnes to do next year, PLs. Just make sure that when school resumes in 2008, you are all set to serve.
At the moment though, I will soon be organising a meeting with all you Sec 3 PLs to discuss about your duties and responsibilities for this year's edition of the Peer Leaders' Training Camp in mid-December. We will be meeting once you are all back from OBS.
It's time for us to raise up a new generation of Peer Leaders. Are the Sec 2 trainees ready to rise up and step into bigger shoes?
Thursday, November 01, 2007
About a mournful reunion
Yesterday I had a brief reunion with several of my JC friends.
It's been years since I've last met some of them.
We got together at a quiet corner of Bukit Timah, and we weren't celebrating.
One of our JC mates have passed away, and we were there to take a last look at her.
She was a classmate of mine. One vivid memory I had of her was at the tennis courts of the old NJC. Together with a few others, we had a merry game of tennis during PE. She was quite a mean player. She was certainly a cheerful and confident lady.
After years of suffering from an illness, we know that she rests in peace now, free from all her struggles and sufferings.
We will always remember you, Jacqueline.
It's been years since I've last met some of them.
We got together at a quiet corner of Bukit Timah, and we weren't celebrating.
One of our JC mates have passed away, and we were there to take a last look at her.
She was a classmate of mine. One vivid memory I had of her was at the tennis courts of the old NJC. Together with a few others, we had a merry game of tennis during PE. She was quite a mean player. She was certainly a cheerful and confident lady.
After years of suffering from an illness, we know that she rests in peace now, free from all her struggles and sufferings.
We will always remember you, Jacqueline.
Friday, October 26, 2007
About mistakes that should never be repeated twice
When I flipped through the school annual, I was eagerly looking for the photo of the Peer Leaders.
To my dismay, there was no such photo. Neither was there any section devoted to the Peer Leaders.
I utterly exploded within me. Miss Shawna, standing beside me, took the year book from me and tried looking for it too, while I muttered unspeakeable words in the air.
I had already told them last year. Yet this mistake has been allowed to happen again.
I'm boiling because I know my Peer Leaders will also be asking questions about the obvious omission. They want their photo to be up there. For goodness sake they've done a lot for the school. It is also bloody obvious that the PLs mean a lot to me, simply because I have unshakeable belief in their capacity to serve the school day in, day out.
Needless to say, I am not one to hide my feelings. My colleague in the editorial committee bore the brunt of my agitated questioning. I asked her, 'Where's the PL photo in the yearbook?'
I was raging deep inside. Those students who collected the IHG Captain's Ball medals from me had no idea. Those students who sat through the English Paper 2 papers with me in the Concourse had no idea.
Nobody has any idea how mad I was.
What am I supposed to say? It is obviously a mistake, but I know not who is responsible for this glaring error.
But I will find out.
When something's not right, I do not intend to let the matter rest. I will rectify it.
To my dismay, there was no such photo. Neither was there any section devoted to the Peer Leaders.
I utterly exploded within me. Miss Shawna, standing beside me, took the year book from me and tried looking for it too, while I muttered unspeakeable words in the air.
I had already told them last year. Yet this mistake has been allowed to happen again.
I'm boiling because I know my Peer Leaders will also be asking questions about the obvious omission. They want their photo to be up there. For goodness sake they've done a lot for the school. It is also bloody obvious that the PLs mean a lot to me, simply because I have unshakeable belief in their capacity to serve the school day in, day out.
Needless to say, I am not one to hide my feelings. My colleague in the editorial committee bore the brunt of my agitated questioning. I asked her, 'Where's the PL photo in the yearbook?'
I was raging deep inside. Those students who collected the IHG Captain's Ball medals from me had no idea. Those students who sat through the English Paper 2 papers with me in the Concourse had no idea.
Nobody has any idea how mad I was.
What am I supposed to say? It is obviously a mistake, but I know not who is responsible for this glaring error.
But I will find out.
When something's not right, I do not intend to let the matter rest. I will rectify it.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
About my thoughts recently
The amount of work coming to me has been simply relentless.
Tomorrow's big event is just one of many projects that have come my way.
Over the next two months I can hardly see a window of time when I can truly sit back and relax. Sometimes I cannot bear to think anymore, when I've been thinking and planning so much. My mind's just so drained.
And then there's the line-up of races I've signed up for myself. Some are plain crazy, like the seventy-something storey Vertical Marathon up the Swissotel next month. There's the Osim Coporate Triathlon to train for. There's the 15 km REAL Run coming up in 2 weekends. And there's the small matter of the Stan-Chart 42km marathon in December. Just 3 days ago I completed a 2-hour run non-stop and man, it felt great, just to know that my body is getting stronger with every step. Every training run is going to help. These runs along the beach are like a dyke that protects my sanity from the eroding waves of work that keeps coming and coming and coming.
Sometimes, I sit back and think about my job, my family, my life, my faith, and then I realise that no matter how exhausted or how overwhelmed life can make me, I must then think this way: for every tough day life may deal me, I must remember the ten, twenty blessings that God has blessed me with. And then, once it becomes apparent that I am blessed, I need not be bothered anymore with unfavourable or tough circumstances, because I know I will come through them victoriously.
My thoughts are also with my dear students who are due to sit for the O Level examinations in a matter of days. It is good to see so many students who are disciplined enough to study everyday. It is brilliant when students come for the lessons during the special timetable and use the time wisely to get useful practice for those subjects. For my own class 4E5, it is very obvious - Ms Kum and I want each and every one of you to do well in the coming exams.
In particular, I am very inspired to see Peixuan and Yisan faithfully sitting in the Concourse, pursuing teachers to clarify their doubts and review their practice papers. The teachers are simply delighted to be able to help you, because you have an appetite to learn. Ask and it shall be given.
I am sure many others are studying hard too. Don't stop! If you're feeling tired and want to give up, tell yourself to snap out of it.
Remember, it's not over until the time is up for the very last O Level paper. Till then, make sure you are 110% prepared for every subject you sit for.
Finally, the one thing on TV that I look forward to with a keen sense of anticipation is the ongoing Rugby Union World Cup. I'm not ashamed to declare that the team I'm supporting is England. It has to be, having lived there for 4 years.
Having seen them hit rock bottom by their hapless hammering by South Africa in the group stage, England have risen from the ashes to knock out Australia in the quarter-finals and France in the semi-finals. The funny thing was, nobody gave England a chance. I think the Englishmen's victory over the mighty Wallabies showed the world what resilience and tenacity is all about. It would be good for my basketball boys to watch their matches.
The final is coming up, and they will meet South Africa in the final. It's a re-match. I am not sure who will win, since South Africa is one of the best rugby nations in the world, in the same league as Australia and New Zealand.
But if the English play with the same passion and heart, then I am sure South Africa will find it very tough.
My prediction? England to win, with the handsome Jonny Wilkinson scoring the winning points.
Go catch the match!
Tomorrow's big event is just one of many projects that have come my way.
Over the next two months I can hardly see a window of time when I can truly sit back and relax. Sometimes I cannot bear to think anymore, when I've been thinking and planning so much. My mind's just so drained.
And then there's the line-up of races I've signed up for myself. Some are plain crazy, like the seventy-something storey Vertical Marathon up the Swissotel next month. There's the Osim Coporate Triathlon to train for. There's the 15 km REAL Run coming up in 2 weekends. And there's the small matter of the Stan-Chart 42km marathon in December. Just 3 days ago I completed a 2-hour run non-stop and man, it felt great, just to know that my body is getting stronger with every step. Every training run is going to help. These runs along the beach are like a dyke that protects my sanity from the eroding waves of work that keeps coming and coming and coming.
Sometimes, I sit back and think about my job, my family, my life, my faith, and then I realise that no matter how exhausted or how overwhelmed life can make me, I must then think this way: for every tough day life may deal me, I must remember the ten, twenty blessings that God has blessed me with. And then, once it becomes apparent that I am blessed, I need not be bothered anymore with unfavourable or tough circumstances, because I know I will come through them victoriously.
My thoughts are also with my dear students who are due to sit for the O Level examinations in a matter of days. It is good to see so many students who are disciplined enough to study everyday. It is brilliant when students come for the lessons during the special timetable and use the time wisely to get useful practice for those subjects. For my own class 4E5, it is very obvious - Ms Kum and I want each and every one of you to do well in the coming exams.
In particular, I am very inspired to see Peixuan and Yisan faithfully sitting in the Concourse, pursuing teachers to clarify their doubts and review their practice papers. The teachers are simply delighted to be able to help you, because you have an appetite to learn. Ask and it shall be given.
I am sure many others are studying hard too. Don't stop! If you're feeling tired and want to give up, tell yourself to snap out of it.
Remember, it's not over until the time is up for the very last O Level paper. Till then, make sure you are 110% prepared for every subject you sit for.
Finally, the one thing on TV that I look forward to with a keen sense of anticipation is the ongoing Rugby Union World Cup. I'm not ashamed to declare that the team I'm supporting is England. It has to be, having lived there for 4 years.
Having seen them hit rock bottom by their hapless hammering by South Africa in the group stage, England have risen from the ashes to knock out Australia in the quarter-finals and France in the semi-finals. The funny thing was, nobody gave England a chance. I think the Englishmen's victory over the mighty Wallabies showed the world what resilience and tenacity is all about. It would be good for my basketball boys to watch their matches.
The final is coming up, and they will meet South Africa in the final. It's a re-match. I am not sure who will win, since South Africa is one of the best rugby nations in the world, in the same league as Australia and New Zealand.
But if the English play with the same passion and heart, then I am sure South Africa will find it very tough.
My prediction? England to win, with the handsome Jonny Wilkinson scoring the winning points.
Go catch the match!
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
About a chance meeting on a bus today
It was great to walk out of school in the bright sunshine. Rarely do I get the chance to be able to head for home at 2.15pm sharp. But this week being the examination week, with no CCA or meetings, I thought I might as well just leave, and forget about the pile of work on my table for today.
But being a little bit of a workaholic, I did lug along my laptop. Who knows, I might end up in a cafe, on the way home, and get some work done, with a good ol cup of hot chocolate to keep me warm.
But the best thing that happened was actually when I was seated on a bus. A lady plonked herself next to me. I looked up and saw a very pleasant and familiar face.
You know, it's always fantastic to meet ex-students, and it's even better if we get to have a chat. And I did enjoy catching up with her. Hey XY, life in the polytechnic is never easy but keep working at it, and keep up with the new topics and notes regularly, and I'm sure you'll do fine. And holla, it's nice to know you're into triathlons too!
The bus eventually ended up at Suntec City. My ex-student had already gotten off the bus earlier. I was supposed to head for the nearby bus-stop for a bus transfer but I made a short detour to the Starbuck's and I really got myself a cup of hot chocolate and started to blog this entry.
Well, back to work!
But being a little bit of a workaholic, I did lug along my laptop. Who knows, I might end up in a cafe, on the way home, and get some work done, with a good ol cup of hot chocolate to keep me warm.
But the best thing that happened was actually when I was seated on a bus. A lady plonked herself next to me. I looked up and saw a very pleasant and familiar face.
You know, it's always fantastic to meet ex-students, and it's even better if we get to have a chat. And I did enjoy catching up with her. Hey XY, life in the polytechnic is never easy but keep working at it, and keep up with the new topics and notes regularly, and I'm sure you'll do fine. And holla, it's nice to know you're into triathlons too!
The bus eventually ended up at Suntec City. My ex-student had already gotten off the bus earlier. I was supposed to head for the nearby bus-stop for a bus transfer but I made a short detour to the Starbuck's and I really got myself a cup of hot chocolate and started to blog this entry.
Well, back to work!
Friday, September 21, 2007
About appreciation
Hats off to those who ran the 2.4km during this week's round of NAPFA re-tests.
You gave your best and it was such a bonus when you posted good timings, even though it must have been incredibly difficult. Well done. I'm immensely proud of you all.
To the rest of you in my PE classes, I have to say that nothing brings me as much pleasure and satisfaction than to be able to teach you in this subject.
To those who are fasting - happy fasting and look forward to Hari Raya. Take care.
You gave your best and it was such a bonus when you posted good timings, even though it must have been incredibly difficult. Well done. I'm immensely proud of you all.
To the rest of you in my PE classes, I have to say that nothing brings me as much pleasure and satisfaction than to be able to teach you in this subject.
To those who are fasting - happy fasting and look forward to Hari Raya. Take care.
Friday, September 14, 2007
About an incident that disturbed me profoundly
After a week of crafting testimonials for my class, I was nigh fatigued. Over the past few days, I used my leisure time in the evenings and the early mornings, poised at the laptop, to painstakingly type out testimonial after testimonial.
These testimonials are going to be very important to my 4e5 boys and girls, so I better make sure I do a good job!
Yesterday, after a productive morning (where I completed my 39th testimonial), I decided to get out of the Staff Room for a breather. One more second of staring at the computer screen, and I would have lost my marbles.
So I walked to the parade square, and observed some classes having their NAPFA re-tests.
Then, right in front of me was a girl getting ready to do the shuttle run.
And off she went. She ran at a very good speed.
Unfortunately, at the last stretch, she lost her balance just after she picked up the second bean bag and turned.
She stumbled. One, two steps to the side - she was out of control.
She crashed to the ground in a heap, unable to even break the fall.
Then in the next few moments, I saw the worst and best of people immediately after this incident.
Behind me were 3 students from the same class who did not participate in the PE lesson, as they were not in PE attire.
When the girl fell, their shrieking laughter filled the air.
It was obvious that they were laughing at the girl who fell.
My eyes burned with anger. But I did not turn back to reprimand them.
Though their actions were utterly detestable, they were of absolutely no import at that moment.
That injured girl was my priority.
Many pupils who were waiting for their turn to take the shuttle run sat by the side, when the girl stumbled and crashed.
When it happened, they did nothing.
They did not lift a finger to help, nor ask her, "Hey are you all right?"
All they did was to look and pass comments, as the PE teacher of that class tended to the injured girl.
Redemption came in the form of a few pupils from the class who rushed to the aid of the girl. They helped her up, cleaned her nasty wounds, and got her treated at the general office.
Alas.
Too few.
Today, during my English lesson with 4T1, I made it very clear to them:
Help those who need help. Do something. Check with them.
Do not think that 'somebody else will take care of that problem or that person.' Do not think that 'it's not my business.'
If we want the world around us to become a kinder place, we have to realise that it starts with us.
Every day, there are moments that reveal to us someone who will need help - such as help with a broken heart, sadness, homework, relationships. Sometimes all they need is a listening ear. Sometimes all they need to someone to offer them an encouraging word.
Let's keep our eyes open and be sensitive to the feelings of others. And when it is time, let us make a difference in other people's lives, by speaking kindly, and giving support and encouragement, whenever we can.
If we don't do this, then who will?
It's got to start with me, myself and I, isn't it?
Let us own our world. Let us take charge. Let us make the first move and make our world a better place.
4t1 - don't forget what I've taught you!
As for 4e5, the end of the Preliminary Exams is at hand.
I hope you appreciate the value of these exams. It will be the last full dress rehearsal for your O Levels.
Whether you do well or stumble badly, I hope you will reap some learning points from your strengths and weaknesses in your performances.
At this point in time, it is already meaningless to cajole and persuade you to study, study and study.
This is simply because you must already be doing it, at full steam, even right now.
I have to give you this sobering but stark warning: at this critical period of time, there is no such thing as taking a break.
The grim reality is, you are competing with thousands of O Level students across the island to clinch a spot in those ultra-limited courses you fancy in the polytechnic/ junior college.
Just don't get left out. Compete!
These testimonials are going to be very important to my 4e5 boys and girls, so I better make sure I do a good job!
Yesterday, after a productive morning (where I completed my 39th testimonial), I decided to get out of the Staff Room for a breather. One more second of staring at the computer screen, and I would have lost my marbles.
So I walked to the parade square, and observed some classes having their NAPFA re-tests.
Then, right in front of me was a girl getting ready to do the shuttle run.
And off she went. She ran at a very good speed.
Unfortunately, at the last stretch, she lost her balance just after she picked up the second bean bag and turned.
She stumbled. One, two steps to the side - she was out of control.
She crashed to the ground in a heap, unable to even break the fall.
Then in the next few moments, I saw the worst and best of people immediately after this incident.
Behind me were 3 students from the same class who did not participate in the PE lesson, as they were not in PE attire.
When the girl fell, their shrieking laughter filled the air.
It was obvious that they were laughing at the girl who fell.
My eyes burned with anger. But I did not turn back to reprimand them.
Though their actions were utterly detestable, they were of absolutely no import at that moment.
That injured girl was my priority.
Many pupils who were waiting for their turn to take the shuttle run sat by the side, when the girl stumbled and crashed.
When it happened, they did nothing.
They did not lift a finger to help, nor ask her, "Hey are you all right?"
All they did was to look and pass comments, as the PE teacher of that class tended to the injured girl.
Redemption came in the form of a few pupils from the class who rushed to the aid of the girl. They helped her up, cleaned her nasty wounds, and got her treated at the general office.
Alas.
Too few.
Today, during my English lesson with 4T1, I made it very clear to them:
Help those who need help. Do something. Check with them.
Do not think that 'somebody else will take care of that problem or that person.' Do not think that 'it's not my business.'
If we want the world around us to become a kinder place, we have to realise that it starts with us.
Every day, there are moments that reveal to us someone who will need help - such as help with a broken heart, sadness, homework, relationships. Sometimes all they need is a listening ear. Sometimes all they need to someone to offer them an encouraging word.
Let's keep our eyes open and be sensitive to the feelings of others. And when it is time, let us make a difference in other people's lives, by speaking kindly, and giving support and encouragement, whenever we can.
If we don't do this, then who will?
It's got to start with me, myself and I, isn't it?
Let us own our world. Let us take charge. Let us make the first move and make our world a better place.
4t1 - don't forget what I've taught you!
As for 4e5, the end of the Preliminary Exams is at hand.
I hope you appreciate the value of these exams. It will be the last full dress rehearsal for your O Levels.
Whether you do well or stumble badly, I hope you will reap some learning points from your strengths and weaknesses in your performances.
At this point in time, it is already meaningless to cajole and persuade you to study, study and study.
This is simply because you must already be doing it, at full steam, even right now.
I have to give you this sobering but stark warning: at this critical period of time, there is no such thing as taking a break.
The grim reality is, you are competing with thousands of O Level students across the island to clinch a spot in those ultra-limited courses you fancy in the polytechnic/ junior college.
Just don't get left out. Compete!
Thursday, September 06, 2007
About an aural assault
The moment I stepped into the mall, I really wanted to make an exit.
Yesterday, waiting for my wife in Millenia Walk became a nauseating affair.
Of course, it has completely nothing to do with her.
It's noise, that assails you from every angle.
Some are thinly disguised as music, blared out loudly from the ubiqitous boutiques and electronic stores. The lunchtime crowd's incessant chatter raised the decibels up several notches.
It's hard to think and it's hard to talk.
No wonder we can get edgy at the slightest thing - our souls can never be at rest if we are constantly provocated by noise. Even our buses now no longer provide a haven of peace and serenity. The tv shows on the dull screens are irksome, to be honest.
Maybe it's the crowds. Maybe it was something that someone said earlier that disturbed me.
But I know clearly that when my mood's not right, I ain't going anywhere near somebody or some place that stays noisy. It won't help.
Yesterday, waiting for my wife in Millenia Walk became a nauseating affair.
Of course, it has completely nothing to do with her.
It's noise, that assails you from every angle.
Some are thinly disguised as music, blared out loudly from the ubiqitous boutiques and electronic stores. The lunchtime crowd's incessant chatter raised the decibels up several notches.
It's hard to think and it's hard to talk.
No wonder we can get edgy at the slightest thing - our souls can never be at rest if we are constantly provocated by noise. Even our buses now no longer provide a haven of peace and serenity. The tv shows on the dull screens are irksome, to be honest.
Maybe it's the crowds. Maybe it was something that someone said earlier that disturbed me.
But I know clearly that when my mood's not right, I ain't going anywhere near somebody or some place that stays noisy. It won't help.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)