After the Sundown debacle in May 2009, demons appeared, casting doubts to fall before my feet.
Running is intertwined with my sense of well-being. Since that black day, I have been building up my bruised confidence. I whispered a goal to myself - to complete one more marathon and make a total comeback.
A series of 10k runs through the year was achieved. Crossing the finishing line in those races added a measure of confidence within me - that my back could withstand the pounding.
The final month leading to the SCMS was derailed by a succession of bacterial infections. The antibiotics were strong and I was forced to rest. My running programme became impossible to follow, and worse still - physically I did not feel robust.
Though this marathon isn't my first, yet on the eve of the marathon, my nerves were fraying. Setting a target time was impossible, because I did not know for sure if I could even last the distance.
So I prayed. I prayed for health, and the wisdom to know - during the race - if I could press on to finish the race, or to be courageous enough to bow out if my body cannot handle the rigour.
I turned up at the start line, under the glittering Xmas lights on Orchard Road. In the midst of the countless runners, I kept my thoughts above the incessant chatter.
Thoughts ran clearly through my head - take it easy, enjoy the marathon, this is your chance for redemption.
Filled with optimism - having self-talked my way into a confident position - I took on the race.
By the 7km mark, my running came to a shuddering halt. This is the price for falling sick in November. Regardless, I kept moving.
The hours were long. As dawn broke, and the sun became scorching, I refused to wither. In fact, the more I became laid back - the better I felt.
This marathon is not one for me to set PBs or outdo my previous performance. The only success indicator for me is this - to complete the 42km without feeling any damage from my back.
A sense of euphoria overwhelmed me when I crossed the finish line. My body, though racked with creaking muscles and pulsating blisters - felt fine. There was a backache - but nothing more. In this I rejoiced. The medal & the t-shirt were just a bonus.
Most importantly - now I know I can do it. Hopefully, this will spur me on to continue running in the coming years.
For now, it is time for a well-deserved rest. In my current school, I have nothing but gratitude and thanks for all the goodness I have experienced. Next year will come with it new challenges, but I am certain that they can be overcome.
For my ex-students in Fajar, you are very much in my thoughts. I hope you are all doing fine.
To the Peer Leaders & Basketball players - continue to be a blessing and inspiration to the people around you. The School has taught you well - whether it is through leadership camps, basketball training sessions or day-to-day lessons - so you must be like living waters, and impart those positive values to your juniors and peers.
Finally, a quote that never fails to stir me up:
"Our greatest glory is not succeeding, but rising every time we fall."
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
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1 comment:
I do also miss my ex-students whom so much efforts were put on them. However, i realise their exciting lives just push them forward, attarct their attention upfront. Seldom do they look back, as compared to us. Thus can only wish them well from behind, from afar... Letting them go, keeping them in my memories...
Proud of u, regarding the run :) Nike: Just Do It! Ken: Can Do It!
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